[ Haha Haha Haha ]

$200 Bucks It Is...

A guy goes over to his friend's house, rings the bell, and the wife answers.

" Hi, is Tony home?"

" No, he went to the store."

"Well, you mind if I wait?"

" No, come in."

They sit down and the friend says "You know Nora, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I'd give you a hundred bucks if I could just see one."

Nora thinks about this for a second and figures what the hell - a hundred bucks. She opens her robe and shows one. He promptly thanks her and throws a hundred bucks on the table.

They sit there a while longer and Chris says "They are so beautiful I've got to see the both of them. I'll give you another hundred bucks if I could just see the both of them together."

Nora thinks about this and thinks what the hell, opens her robe, and gives Chris a nice long look. Chris thanks her, throws another hundred bucks on the table, and then says he can't wait any longer and leaves.

A while later Tony arrives home and his wife says "You know, your weird friend Chris came over. "

Tony thinks about this for a second and says "Well did he drop off the 200 bucks he owes me?"

A Day in Hell

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...

Demon: Why so glum chum?
Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy: Wow...that's...awesome!

Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.

Demon: You into drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!

Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uh no.

Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.

[ Tukang Kritik ]

Hey kamu, laki-laki yang selalu berdiri dengan dagu terangkat
Ya! Kamu!
Berapa tattoo yang kamu punya?
8 lah!
Kamu potong apa rambutmu?
Mohawk yang kadang gak jelas arahnya..
Apa hobimu?
Mengkritik pastinya..

[ Ada Yang Dateng Pasti Ada Yang Pergi ]

Sejak tanggal 5 itu, gw mutusin buat memperbaiki hidup gw dengan ngejalanin satu hubungan dengan seseorang yang gak asing di idup gw sebelumnya. Bedanya, sekarang dengan komitmen baru. Tanpa paksaan, gw ma dia cuma menjalani yang ada di depan mata. Walopun masih ragu sama apa yang gw ambil, gw yakin untuk sekarang dia yang terbaik.
Tapi sejujurnya, ada sedikit yang bikin gw mikir. Apa gw siap keilangan dia yang selama ini jagain gw? Apa gw siap kalo dia harus pergi? Gw rasa kalo mau ngikutin perasaan gw ya jawabannya bakal selalu gak. Gw takut keilangan dia. Takut dia pergi. Takut dia gak ada lagi di idup gw. Padahal gw selalu butuh dia, walopun konteks nya beda sekarang.
Huffftt...okay! Gw cuma selalu inget semua yang dia bilang, semua harus dibikin gampang coz idup ini udah susah. Okay, kita bikin gampang sekarang. Setiap Ada Yang Dateng Pasti Ada Yang Pergi. As Simple As Dat. Kaya Setiap Ada Yang Lahir Pasti Ada Yang Mati. Gampang dan simple bukan??